Stage 3 Project 01: Can Ricart - Final presentation

This time around, my presentation went horribly badly, because I was distracted all week-end for having been assigned an inappropriate crit space. This made me feel extremely anxious, and highly dislike everything that I had been working for. What is the point of all of this if it cannot at least be appreciated in a proper way? 

I guess I have learned many things during this project, but I am not very happy with the way that I managed the highly important part, which is the presentation. Due to this I lost my enthusiasm concerning  architecture. Perhaps this means that my explorations of the world of architecture have to evolve towards something more diagrammatical, perhaps simpler and more straightforward. 

I am additionally getting the feeling that architecture is more about pretty pictures instead of buildings, and this confuses me. What should I be aiming for? Graphical style, or quality of design? Or capability of conveying ideas through imagery? 

This all makes me very unsure about what the whole point of working excessive hours is. Have I learned something, yes. But has this made me feel happy? I don't think so. It has left me feeling tired, stressed and with lack of enthusiasm that I used to have while designing previously. 

For once, I would like to work towards something concrete, which makes me truly fascinated and happy. Perhaps the graduation project will be the opportunity I am waiting for. 

Sometimes it is good to get things out of my system. Just get them done, and move on. What have I learned? That architecture can be confusing as a subject of education, because it takes a lot of time and dedication, which does create a good skillbase, but the work completed has no intrinsic value beyond theory; it is something we simply do to learn 'to architect' (Unwin). Hence, my feeling of hopelessness after a long project is due to the fact that something that has seemingly been my whole life during the past 9 weeks, is gone, dead, thrown away. I wish I could read this text later in life and look back with understanding of my feelings. 'In hindsight this all was worth it', because I learned an important lesson about myself (and some things to do with architecture in the process). Is architecture a subject concerning 'architecture' as the built environment (a field of study in which we study buildings...), or is it a subject through which architects are created? 

The next step of my studies shall be to focus on my dissertation focusing on the Studio and learning within it. This relates to the space, but also the methodology and culture within.

Kind regards,